Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus is a book based on several genres such as relationships, non-fiction, psychology and self-help. It is authored by John Gray who is an American relationship counselor and writer. In 1993 he wrote this book which became a best seller for a long time. Since then millions of people have bought this book and read it.It has been reported by CNN as the highest ranked nonfiction work of 1990s after being on best sellers list for 121 weeks.
In this book Gray describes how men and women look at the give and take in a relationship. Since men and women both have difference in the way they look at the gestures of care and love in a relationship. This leaves many lopes and holes in terms of understanding between both individuals resulting in soured relationships and conflicts. It also results in one person thinking that they are giving more into a relationship while receiving less. In this case communication is one of the ways that can help to improve status of a relationship.
Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus
Often people don’t know that they themselves and their partner have naturally different scoring standards. Women use points grading system which usually men don’t acknowledge. For women empathy and show of emotions has more value regardless of its magnitude. On the other hand men give less credit to small acts of kindness or gratitude and they prefer magnitude over number of times certain good act was done. There for men credit their earning as something of really high value because it produces a check of large amount and they consider acts of empathy inferior to it. However for women it’s opposite they may not acknowledge pay check as a substitute for a careless behavior in a relationship.
Gary shows how there two differences cause conflicts. Another important issue is the way both deal with stress and anxiety. When men are in stress they either take solitude for a while or engage in some activity with friends. This results in analyzing problem from a fresh perspective. While women on the other hand are inclined to talk about their problems to someone close even if talking about problem won’t give any solution. This results in situations in which men are trying to avoid but women are trying to discuss the worrying issue during stressful situation.
Gary advice that men should respect the emotional aspect of women rather than telling her why she should not fell the way normally women do. This is so as to respect the way women are made.
About the author
John Gray is an American lecturer , author and relationship counselor. For nine years he was an associate Maharishi Mahesh Yogi before starting his career as relationship counselor and an author. About 50 million copies of his most famous book Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus have been sold up till now.
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